E N E R G Y
by D.Genesis
Summary: "You can stop running now," Sasuke says, voice low. It's shaking and reverberates through his skin. "Or at least, wait for me." SasuNaru yaoi lime-sorta
1. E N E R G Y

**Warnings: **AU after Sasuke leaves with Orochimaru**. Slash** (meaning boy with boy in romantic and/or sexual relations.) Language that may offend. Violence. Adult situations. Suggestive dialogue. Heavily edited **sex scenes**. (Should be FF Net safe) Character death.  
**Un'beta'd! This is a dark and angsty fic** with a very open ending.  
_**I have warned you**_. If you are uncomfortable with **any** of this, then turn back now.  
**Disclaimer: **This is a work of fanfiction, written purely to entertain myself and (hopefully) whoever else stumbles upon this and finds it amusing.  
**Main pairings,** _**Top/Bottom:**_ Sasuke/Naruto, Kiba/Naruto, Sasuke/Naruto

Note the above warnings/pairings. If it's not labelled then don't worry about it.  
Written in present tense, just because I wanted to try something new. Inspired by the song Energy by Keri Hilson. The style is also a lot different from my usual. Please read and review :)

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- ENERGY -

サスケxナルト

The first time Naruto runs into Sasuke after both vow to end the other's life, Naruto is almost killed. _Again_. Just shy of his sixteenth birthday.

The council Elders—as usual—fuck up and it's the Uchiha _strangely _to the rescue.

Saved by the dark-haired boy when it's his own mission partner gone rogue trying to splatter his brains all over a wall. Oh, the irony.

Yeah, Naruto has come to appreciate such things. _This_ being one of them.

He also comes to appreciate the fact that Sasuke is a _very_ good-looking guy; when he _isn't_ almost killing Naruto or working for—_or with—_the guy that wants Naruto dead. He can also be good company, in that whole strong and silent kind of way. With the occasional command to; _follow quietly_ and or when that fails; _shut up_. Not to mention his ever favourite—and by now somewhat trite—_hn._

Though Naruto thinks it, he _never_ ever says it and thankfully, two years is enough to hide what he's thinking and feeling. To an extent, anyway. Which is just as well since he ends up in the boy's company for _over a __**week**_.

Then they part ways; on much better terms than the last run in and with perhaps a new understanding and Naruto thinks, _Sasuke isn't so bad_ and _maybe I can still save him._

Later, he kicks himself for his thoughts and recalls everything he can about _why_ he can't trust Sasuke anymore..

He's barely seventeen when he ends up on the wrong side of a massive drug syndicate who sell him off as fodder. Not too different to when he pissed off that other guy, actually. Except that they find _other_ uses for him.

Naruto is frustrated and terrified and angry. He's never had this sort of thing happen to him before. He can accept chidori's to the chest and weapons and fighting for his life but… but…

He hasn't had time to lose his virginity to someone he actually _likes_. Hasn't considered it. Never found it important. Never even _dated_. And now he really wishes he had. Maybe it's stupid but he'd rather not lose it to some STI carrying bastard or be treated as someone's spoilt little pet. That isn't the worst of it, though.

If only it was.

They _**like**_ him—the guy that buys him and his friend—they like that Naruto is disobedient and wilful and spirited. They like his pretty, **pretty** _exotic-looking_ face and his body that never _ever_ scars. They take him _everywhere_ they go; on a leash two metre's long. But that doesn't help Naruto out or get the information that the council is wanting.

Yeah, it was a setup. Lucky him.

But he's in too deep and has no help and isn't even really sure what The Council are wanting from this lot.

However, Sasuke does.

He turns up in time to find Naruto shackled to a chair, his owner attempting to teach him the art of fellatio on a shinai and the sword-wielder's friend out cold; nose broken and possibly drowning in his own blood—courtesy of the blonde teen.

Naruto isn't surprised by Sasuke's abrupt appearance.

But, his owner _is_.

Before anything else can possibly go wrong, both of Naruto's keepers are instantly dead and he is freed from his cuffs and his chakra-absorbing-collar.

Sasuke doesn't say anything, but it's clear that he's concerned. It doesn't take a genius as to why that case may be; Naruto is barely dressed and his body is a canvas of blue-black finger prints, the edges a sickly green. He's also splattered in blood and… other…

**Much** more questionable fluids.

"I'm fine," Naruto assures and it's _mostly_ true. "You sorta killed them before they could do anything to me." Which is **a complete **_**lie**_.

But Naruto comes away from the event with his virginity still—miraculously—intact, so he figures, _what's a few more invisible scars to add to the heap?_ It could have been worse. Could still **be** worse. But his owner tried to break him in slowly, so maybe the guy wasn't an utter prick after all.

What the _**fuck**_ is he thinking?

Sasuke doesn't quite believe him.

Not that Naruto really expects him to. Plus the boy's probably had training in how to detect lies and, yeah…er. All that other stuff.

_Whatever._

So Sasuke casts him neutral glances and keeps frowning and drags Naruto protesting into a wagon. Then he proceeds to drive the horses on for hours and _hours_. As if to outrun the terrible night, until dawn finally breaks and Naruto can sleep, unafraid of nightmares and finally, he feels _safe_.

Then he's bundled up and dumped off on the doorstep of the Council.

Without showering first.

He _reeks_.

Sometimes, Sasuke can be such a **prick**. But Naruto figures this is for the benefit of The Council. A _'look what you've done'_ and a _'shame on you'_ sort of deal. Heh, like trying to pull a guilt trip on them would work.

Nothing can make them pity him. Not the container of the demon fox. But Tsunade—

When Tsunade sees him, she _actually_ **cries**.

Then she leaves the room and he can hear things _breaking_. Glasses. Bottles? Then the sound of cracking wood.

Naruto doesn't see Sasuke again for some time.

Days…

Then _weeks_.

Time eventually bleeds into months.

And The Hokage doesn't call on him. Refuses to let the Council use him in this way. Refuses outright to let him leave the village. Which is _something_ and Naruto misses it all. The adrenalin rush, the fights, the weapons, the constant _near misses_. And, yup maybe it's the masochist in him that also misses the injuries.

Then the Council_** does**_ call. All is well. Life returns to normal.

And Naruto is sold into slavery. He's used goods already, isn't he? Why not offer him up on a chopping block for the highest bidder?

Now he knows why Tsunade baa-chan was absent from his briefing.

Wherever she is, she must be _pissed_.

The assignment _doesn't_ go well. Naruto refuses to obey—what _the __**hell**_ is up with people trying to collar him like a dog?—and this time, Sasuke doesn't give anyone a chance to lay a finger on him. He steals Naruto the moment his new owner's back is turned and drags Naruto away cloaked in a dark and brooding silence.

Before Naruto is returned to Konoha this time, he is dragged to a high-class brothel and shoved into a room where Sasuke shares one last piece of advice; "If you want to play at adult games so much, moron, then you should at least be educated on the basics first."

Then Sasuke leaves Naruto to the capable hands of the lovely ladies of the night, only for Naruto to discover he _much_ prefers Sasuke's company to theirs.

It isn't until Naruto is nineteen that he realises that Sasuke just might be slightly interested in _him_.

In _that_ way.

The concept is absurd, except that Naruto can't shake the feeling. Especially not when he's towelling his hair dry, water still dripping down his back and chest with Sasuke's eyes adhered to him with such intensity. He doesn't want to push his luck but more than that, he doesn't want the Uchiha to leave.

They _aren't_ on a mission. Sasuke _**isn't**_ saving him. They just happened to sort of end up at the same place at the same time. And yeah, that in itself makes Naruto wonder but he doesn't say what he's thinking and neither does Sasuke. So that's okay.

In the end, he isn't sure who makes the first move.

He thinks it may have been him, but can't be certain. There is one too many drinks involved and maybe some teasing—though that part's a bit of a blur in Naruto's intoxicated mind and the guy he selects isn't all that attractive anyway—but next thing he knows, he's up against a tree.

And not in a bad way.

Not at all.

Who knew Sasuke would be the jealous type?

He's also _very_ hands on. He always was.

The first time _it_ happens, Naruto fights back.

_Tries_ to fight back.

But he never was as fast as Sasuke. Never quite as strong as the older boy, or talented or—or any number of things that the dark-haired boy was—_is_ and Sasuke easily over powers him. So easily, it's embarrassing. And far more than a simple blow to Naruto's pride as he lays on the ground, a carpet of lush green grass beneath him.

It isn't rape. He knows what rape is and _this_ isn't it. _It's... something_, he muses then sighs into Sasuke's mouth.

It takes very little time for the older boy to manoeuvre them around and strip Naruto of all his clothing and fuck him senseless against the uneven ground. The roughness bites into Naruto's back and Sasuke bites into his neck, branding him with his teeth and a hot, _hot_ mouth. His breathing is heavy. Heavier than Naruto has ever heard it before and then Sasuke presses in deeper and the angle is—_oh, fuck yes sososo __**good**_—that Naruto forgets everything but the primal need to push _back_.

_It feels strange_, he thinks wondering at the almost itch at the back of his neck, his naked, heaving, _convulsing_ body.

His hands hurt from gripping at Sasuke's haori and he adjusts his hips just so and—he smirks _triumphant_ as Sasuke's hand clamps down almost viciously on his arm. The look he shoots the blonde should be lethal but then Naruto sighs and comes. All over his and Sasuke's stomachs. "All yours," he says and everything seems forgiven.

Five rounds later, Naruto is aching all over and doubts he'll walk for a long, long time.

He can't be happier.

Nor can Kyuubi who claims, "It's about damn time."

What he's doing is a capital offense. _Treason_. But Naruto doesn't care.

He meets up with Sasuke—_accidentally_—every so often and things seem good. No. Not simply just good but frigging _Great_. Warranting a capital 'G' and everything.

Sometimes Naruto wonders how this all happened, wasn't he in love with Sakura all those years? And Sasuke, what about him? It isn't love, Naruto is pretty sure he doesn't love the other boy—_no, man now_—he automatically corrects. Neither are boys any longer. Both no longer innocent by any stretch of the imagination; body, soul or mind. It must be lust, he decides finally. Happy with this conclusion, he doesn't hesitate when Sasuke reveals himself later that night.

_This isn't so bad,_ he thinks as he sinks into the softness beneath him, Sasuke surrounding him and in between his legs. Though he is still bitter about the fact that Sasuke never yields any control. He never gives himself up to Naruto, though sometimes the blonde wonders whom exactly is claiming whom.

Then his legs are pressed _back_ and Sasuke is moving _forward_ and Naruto forgets to think. All he can do is feel and hopes he doesn't fall apart like all the other times they're together like this and he finds himself gazing upon flawless ivory skin, inky tresses and eyes darker than midnight.

Never has he applied the word 'beautiful' to Sasuke before, but he thinks it now as he reaches his orgasm. The image is shattered when Sasuke comes with a gruff—somewhat startled—bark a moment later—staring at something Naruto can't see—and someone else's name on his lips.

Naruto doesn't give Sasuke a chance to recover, or explain. He knocks the man out and is long gone before the Uchiha even regains consciousness.

It's a testament to how angry, and hurt and used he feels that Naruto manages to get one up on the assassin, after having the man's _um, er… __**yeah**_—rammed up his arse. Under normal circumstances, he knows he'd never have achieved it; walking is a difficulty let alone the ability to run or fight.

And isn't it funny how even now he can't even _think_ the 'C' word when applied to himself without his brain short-circuiting?

One day he'll look back at this and smile. Realise how childish and petty this is. But that time isn't now.

Life goes on. Naruto tries—and fails—to forget the betrayal, the longing, the way someone else's name rolled off Sasuke's tongue.

But that's okay. He's gotten over that now. It doesn't hurt nearly so much. Really. _Seriously_.

Sometimes he just likes to pretend.

He pretends that he lived a normal childhood and finished school before going off and becoming an apprentice for something else. Sometimes it's teaching, other times medicine and occasionally art. But mostly, he thinks about games and how if he'd been doing that instead of playing at ninjas he would have saved himself the trouble. The insanity and darkness. The multitude of invisible scars.

It isn't easy and he almost convinces himself it's all a horrible nightmare until Sasuke pops up again.

And again.

And _again_.

No matter where he goes Sasuke is _always there_ and Naruto thinks that maybe he might be the slightest bit insane. One too many knocks to the head. But he just can't get away…

When Tsunade-sama calls him into her office he doesn't decline. When she tells him about the assignment he asks her; _where_ and _for how long_ and _**doesn't**_ say _no_ when she tells him he leaves tomorrow. It's a simple grade C mission. Just time-consuming. So Naruto goes home and packs his things and leaves the Fire country behind him; because if Sasuke is there, he can't be here and maybe Naruto will finally, _finally_ escape the heartache.

The plan is brilliant. It's foolproof. Nothing can possibly go wrong.

Except that is does; because Sasuke somehow follows him.

He trails him back to Konoha, too and isn't even trying to hide the fact since Kiba manages to point him out more than once. Naruto looks long and hard at his old friend and makes him an offer he realises the other can't refuse. He wonders how he hadn't noticed this before.

_Isn't payback a bitch?_

When Naruto comes for the third time that night, legs spread and Kiba still—_oh, mmm fuck_—_**moving**_ between them, a mixture of sweat and come and saliva coating their stomachs and thighs and cheeks, Naruto thinks he can get used to this. Maybe. And Kiba, he understands now, has been waiting for this for forever. That Kiba's been waiting on _him_ for forever. Would it really be so difficult to return the feelings?

_No_, Naruto decides. _It won't be difficult at all_.

And it isn't.

He doesn't turn Kiba down when his friend asks him—almost _shyly_, because shy isn't an adjective normally applied to the boisterous young man—to move in a few weeks later and things, strangely enough, can't get any better. Kiba might not be Sasuke but Kiba loves him, that much is so painfully obvious now he thinks on it and maybe, he might love Kiba just a little bit, too.

Time flows on. Pausing every so often before jumping forward again in energetic leaps and bounds.

Everything is perfect. Or, as close to perfect as anything gets and maybe, Naruto thinks one night curled around Kiba after more mind-blowing sex, that he might love Kiba a whole lot more than a little. It's a tad bit early but it's the most he's felt since…

_Since…_

"Are you okay?"

Naruto blinks at Kiba and lies. "Yeah."

"You're thinking about it again." This time Kiba doesn't let Naruto lie to him; he rolls over. Before Naruto has time to recover completely, Kiba is distracting him in the best way he knows how and for the next few hours Naruto forgets everything except his lover's name.

Then one day Naruto comes home to find Kiba dead; a gaping hole through his chest.

His heart is gone.

The ever loyal Akamaru is at his master's side and lying in pieces.

There is no sign of a struggle. Not that Naruto expects to find one. Sasuke is now a contract killer—a missing nin of the S category—arguably one of the best and he wouldn't be considered this if he couldn't execute a simple B and E.

And it _is_ Sasuke who killed Kiba. The whole setup reeks of him and no one else would have gone through all the effort just to get Naruto's attention. But capture Naruto's attention, he does.

Now the roles are reversed. The chase is on.

Naruto hunts Sasuke down and finds it somehow appropriate that it's back to the _Valley of the End _where their deranged game of tag finally comes to a halt.

Like the first time, he follows the other—ex-lover and friend—as if this is all predetermined. And like before, the man is simply there. _Unlike_ the first time, though, Naruto withdraws a kunai with every intent to kill. He isn't a child anymore, he isn't innocent and has absolutely no qualms with taking another's life. Especially if that means saving several more.

Especially if that means…

_Kiba…_

Yes. That Kiba will be avenged.

"Naruto," Sasuke says and the sound of his voice makes Naruto angrier. Sasuke doesn't turn around to face him, doesn't move despite the obvious danger he's in and it occurs to Naruto that maybe Sasuke's just as tired of this game as he is.

"You killed Kiba," Naruto nearly snarls, needing to say it. To give a reason for his sudden appearance if nothing else. Like the explanation is even needed. Sasuke knows why he's here even if Naruto isn't entirely sure of that himself. "Why?"

And just like that, Sasuke who was almost placid moments ago looks ready to committee murder himself. His eyes, as he turns around finally, are a deep bloody red.

_Hahahaha_… Somehow Naruto finds that _almost_ funny. He _almost_ smiles.

But doesn't.

"You know why," the Uchiha replies. Voice suddenly thick.

It's sexy as hell, actually. But now Naruto is getting sidetracked. Too caught up in memories and the deep, roughness of Sasuke's voice when he speaks like that. Then he wonders what the bigger man would sound like when—

"He was my friend," Naruto says. _ I think I loved him_, he doesn't say.

"A friend that you fucked," Sasuke interjects. His expression now very dark and ugly. He is also stalking closer.

Sasuke seems really quite jealous and it's a change from the usual mask of indifference the man so often wears. And because Naruto can't leave the conversation as it is—and maybe, just maybe he finds this all a _wee_ bit amusing—but he doesn't correct the other man. Technicalities. Does it really matter whom was fucking whom? Instead he answers; "And?"

All anger abruptly vanishes from Sasuke, his expression bland. Though Naruto is acquainted with this look and knows the man is actually trying to puzzle something out. He recognises the instant Sasuke realises his meaning and Naruto takes a step back from the _still_ taller man.

"This is about Kakashi."

And the honesty in his voice is so painful, Naruto wants to look away. Except he can't. Sasuke is still a contract killer, Naruto is still a weapon of Konoha. He isn't a child anymore, he isn't innocent. He no longer classes Sasuke as a friend. He can no longer use this as a shield to hide behind. Nothing to stop the Uchiha from killing him, except for the kunai still held in his hand.

Maybe not even that.

"I've never slept with him."

So instead Naruto nods. "I know," he says and it's the truth. It was obvious from the start.

Kakashi was and would forever be considered a pervert and Sasuke was his pupil, turned fellow group member and friend. There was never anything besides perhaps a familial love—if that—for the Uchiha and Sasuke, it seems, loves Kakashi. But much, _much_ more.

Naruto knows now he is—_was_—merely a substitute for his teacher. They look nothing alike, except maybe in build. Even if Naruto is leaner and shorter because of his childhood. The knowledge still tastes like vinegar, though. Even almost a full year later.

"This was all a mistake."

Wow, the words are no less painful now, despite the fact Naruto knows all this it still _hurts_. Like a final dig before Sasuke goes. One final twist of the bloodied kunai in his barely beating heart and Sasuke took the only person that could help him numb the pain.

"It doesn't explain why you killed Kiba," Naruto mutters, resentful. Hanging on to his righteous anger by teeth and bloody fingernails.

Now Sasuke just seems annoyed. His eyebrow hikes up, appearing condescending and Naruto hates, hates, _**hates**_ the way this makes him feel like a disobedient and idiotic child. _Still_. After all this time. "I assumed you would. We had an agreement."

"I rather thought that agreement null and void when I knocked you out and kept trying to avoid you," Naruto snarks back.

He wishes that he hadn't come here anymore, vengeance or not. Whenever Sasuke's around he can't do anything right. Not even killing the man not two metres away. All his missions and training were good for nothing after all.

Then Sasuke's expression changes—Naruto can only _maybe_ say it's surprise—then Naruto is dropping to his knees, blood spilling from his chest.

There is a vague thud from behind him and Sasuke suddenly filling his vision. A crimson stained katana in his hand—where had _that_ come from?—but not the one that pierced him. Naruto assumes it was used on the body behind him. Knowing Sasuke, he got the guy in the head. There is no coming back from _that_.

And wait _what?_ Naruto's eyelids flutter.

"Focus, idiot."

But he _can't_ focus. Not with everything cart wheeling before his eyes in pairs or triplets. Like foggy, incomplete clones. Not with the searing agony constricting his every breath. Even Kyuubi working furiously to heal him seems stumped at the suddenness of everything. He's silent. Scared and now Naruto is, too.

He thinks he hears Sasuke swear, but isn't sure. Everything sounds like it's coming from down a tunnel. Long and broken.

Maybe, Kiba's waiting at the other end...

Though he doubts he'll be admitted to heaven.

When he wakes, Naruto is surprised. And somewhat disappointed.

He's back in Konoha. In a hospital bed. With the scent of sickness, death and antiseptic lingering about him and walls so white that they scorch his poor, straining retinas. It makes his stomach churn. Then again, that may just be because he's starving and not eaten anything since... However long.

"You're awake," Sakura smiles. It looks tired but genuine. "We've all been worried. You've been out for over a week."

A week? A _week_?

No wonder he feels sick but he pushes this aside to study his friend who is leaning over him and checking his vitals. Her face is drawn and pale. There are dark smudged beneath pale jade eyes and Naruto wonders how he fell out of love with her. She's more stunning now than she ever was as a girl but still, he can't drum up the same feelings for her now that he shared with Kiba or even—

_Better off not going there._

"_How?_"

"Sasuke brought you back," the young woman replies and something in hers eyes flicker. She doesn't use the honorific anymore. Hasn't done so for years. Not after she gave up on bringing him back to the village. Not since her own feelings for him settled and faded into something more familial in nature.

Somehow this information manages to surprise the blonde into a contemplative silence.

He never expected Sasuke to save him. Not after their falling out. Still, he hasn't forgiven the other man for Kiba's death even though Sasuke has saved him. Maybe especially _because_ Sasuke has saved him.

Naruto isn't so sure what to think of anything anymore, so he closes his eyes and exhales and tries to forget.

It doesn't last long.

It _never_ lasts long.

Sakura's words—when she speaks next—are warm and filled with a strange kind of sadness and pride. "I knew if anyone could bring him back, it would be you, Naruto-kun."

She may be right in a sense. But the blonde holds no delusions that the other man is back because of him. In all likelihood it's to see a certain someone _else_ and Naruto happened to be the perfect bargaining tool for entrance at the time.

"I wouldn't hold your breath, Sakura-chan," he mumbles lowly. His chest still aches with the phantom pain of a blade being driven through the cavity and he refuses to acknowledge that the throb is for another reason altogether.

He's rather stubborn that way.

"The Council are holding his trial as we speak," Sakura says, her expression a curious mixture of emotions the injured shinobi can't possibly name.

"Oh yeah?" Naruto asks, though doesn't really care. He can't. Not with his own mutilated self-loathing and guilt and grief and that hideous, _hideous_ jealousy monster lurking in the wings. If he comes to care, he'll be hurt again and this time there is no Kiba to pick up the tiny fragments left behind from Sasuke's carelessness.

He gives a noncommittal grunt.

"They're talking execution."

The sentence has Naruto tensing before he releases another breath and rolls over, unusually exhausted. "Mm."

"Aren't you worried?"

"Worried," he parrots and knows that he _is._ Despite his best intentions. So he focuses on the plain white wall and pulls Kiba's face from one of his many, many happier memories and closes his eyes in hurt.

Worry implies care, which involves emotions he's still denying to feel. "No," he mutters, "No. I _don't_ care."

This seems to rile Sakura, because her voices rises in pitch as she speaks. "He may be put to death, Naruto-kun."

"He may," Naruto agrees, feeling magnanimous and petty. He shoves the last away. "But he killed Kiba."

Sakura falls silent.

There are still many things that need to be addressed after Kiba's grisly murder. Naruto hadn't stuck around long enough to truly mourn the passing of his lover and friend. He wasn't even present at the other's funeral, so intent on slaying the one who had so callously taken the Inuzuka's life. Now he's back. He hopes he can heal and move on and—

Hope is as bad as jealousy.

In fact it's _worse_.

"Sasuke will be fine," Naruto assures Sakura. Though his voice lacks the usual conviction and cheeriness he is somewhat renown for. Slowly, he rolls back over to stare into her eyes. "He's the last Uchiha. The elders will take that into account if for nothing else then for them to use as a stud of sorts."

When nothing of his words seem to register in the pink-haired woman's mind, Naruto adds with a vulpine smirk, "Y'know, for breeding purposes?"

And there folks. We have it. Sakura erupts.

_Exactly_ as the blonde expects her to.

"NARUTO!"

And _ARGH_, does Sakura's punch to the arm hurts like hell but hey, at least he got her to smile. He feels ashamed by the way her eyes light up because he knows, _he knows_ she has so much faith in him and if _he_ believes in something strongly enough—it's practically a truth.

He doesn't point out that despite his passion in pursing her he'd still failed rather spectacularly.

Instead he leaves her to her hope.

Several days later_—as predicted_—Sasuke is released from prison.

Naruto doesn't bother to see him. He knows the details around the man's release. A simple sentence of home detention until further notice. Surprisingly, many people are pissed as hell. Some still crying out for blood, though there are the few who— _naturally_—stick by the Uchiha. Some who still believe him redeemable.

Somehow, Naruto isn't surprised that Kakashi is one of these people.

Nor is he surprised to see the man leaving Sasuke's house late one night. Though he _is_ surprised by the glaringly obvious limp.

It fills him with a sort of malicious glee before the reality of the situation sinks in.

From that night onward, he avoids any and all places that the other man is likely to show. Mostly because it simply isn't fair. Sasuke gets his semi happy ending, why can't Naruto have his? And partly, because he still feels hurt. And maybe just a little jealous but mostly, mostly he thinks that maybe he still lov—

He spends most of his time in the cemetery.

It's morbid but calms him in a way that nothing ever has. So he sits, surrounded by tall green grass and the soft whisper of spirits and just stares into the distance of a future he isn't sure exists anymore. One he no longer thinks he wants.

"What do you think I should do, Kiba?" He asks. The question is spoken softly. In a voice he only ever uses—_used_—in the solitude of their bedroom.

His lover remains as silent as his resting place. His headstone simply casts an _almost_ human-shaped shadow beside Naruto and the latter can't help but feel at ease. As if this is still just Kiba and the other man is silently listening to him speak.

He bows his head to bask.

"He loves you, you know," Sakura says one day.

Her hand on the blonde's tense shoulder. He listens to her words but doesn't turn away, eyes instead locked on the glossy onyx slab that bears Kiba's name.

"I know he did."

"Does," Sakura corrects, "he still loves you, Naruto. Just—"

It occurs to him that he isn't sure what Sakura is talking about. Kiba's gone. Has been for almost a year and everyone has moved on.

Everyone _except_ him.

And maybe Sasuke, whose now out and about and stalking him every chance he gets. And maybe Kakashi, who seems to bear all of Sasuke's sexual appetites. Whenever Naruto sees him now, the silver-haired man is _almost_ always limping. Looks impossibly exhausted and drained more than anything. He always looks one step away from the grave.

At one point Naruto was jealous of his sensei. Now he just pities the man.

_How sad._

"Just?" He asks.

But Sakura shakes her head. She looks disappointed for some reason. "Why can't you see it?"

He isn't sure what _exactly_ he's meant to be seeing. So shrugs and sits down, Kiba's head stone pressed to his side. Familiar and warm in the setting sun. Naruto decides that he'll stay until the last of its warmth fades before seeking out dinner. It's been several days since he's had a bowl of ramen.

What could be the harm?

"Naruto."

He should have known.

_Ignore him_, Naruto chants inwardly, trying to slip away from the rather persistent Uchiha. For the life of him, he can't understand why the other male is _still_ trying to corner him. Isn't he happy with Kakashi? Can't he just leave Naruto alone to lick his sore and festering wounds?

"Oi, idiot."

No. No, it seems he can't.

Finally, Naruto's had enough.

"What!" He spits, spinning on his heel to face the other down. Though it seems as if he really doesn't need to.

Sasuke looks exhausted. Perhaps more so than Kakashi.

He always was pale looking, but now it seems unhealthy though he hasn't lost any weight. If anything, it looks like he may have gained in muscle with the way his clothing stretches over his once leaner frame. His knuckles are bruised and grazed and swollen and all Naruto can do is gape. It's clear he's in desperate need of a shower.

"The hell happened to you!"

Apparently the Uchiha isn't at all happy with the sudden outburst; his shadowed, bloodshot eyes narrow. "You are what's happened to me," He growls out, lowly. "What have you done?"

Naruto is affronted.

"What did I do?" He exclaims in a mixture of exasperation and confusion. "I haven't done _anything_ to you, jerk. I've left you alone since you've been back and have gone out of my way to keep things like that! Now you have the nerve to say _I_ did this to you? You really are a bastard."

Before things can get any worse, he turns hastily away and decides on going home instead. He has some packing to do.

Tsunade-sama looks sad as she hands him the scroll with his recent mission.

It's long term and will take him close to Suna—close to Gaara and help—but is still the most dangerous mission he's _ever_ undertaken. The reason it's even open to him is because they've already lost three others who attempted the same thing and the Council Elders think—_hope_—he'll have an edge with Kyuubi within him.

If they think that, he's dead certain they're wrong. _Again_. But then, they always do fuck up when it comes to him. He suspects it's a suicide mission and is certain Tsunade-sama does, too.

He objects—vehemently—when he see exactly whom he's been partnered with.

It does little—even if Tsunade is leery of him being anywhere _near_ Sasuke—he had brought Naruto back to the village despite being a wanted ninja and there is _no one else_ with the same level of expertise readily available.

Life just sucks.

The mission is difficult—Naruto knew it would be—but it's made that much more uncomfortable by his companion. When they aren't occupied with reconnaissance, deactivating traps or fighting for their lives everything is just so tense. If it isn't mission related, neither of them talk.

It's killing Naruto slowly, this quiet until—

There are strong arms wrapped around him, a warm, hard, _familiar_ body against his, a sharp nose pressed into the junction of his neck and shoulder and darkness obscuring his vision. Hot breath flutters along the flesh, teasing it with a familiarity that floods through his veins like molten lava. A shudder passes from him into the other man. Or maybe it's the other way around.

"I was jealous."

It takes almost an eternity for Naruto to reply. Not through lack of trying, he's just so utterly baffled by the other's declaration that he can't think straight. Even though he is aware, on some level, that he had known this already. Hearing Sasuke actually speak it is completely different.

_I already knew that, Bastard_, he decides, and tries to pry the arms from his body but his limbs refuse to co-operate. _The missing heart sort of tipped me off. Now get off me. I refuse to be your bit on the side!_

The arms around him tighten imperceptibly.

"You're the only one, Naruto."

And Naruto is instantly furious. His fists ball angrily and his struggles to get free grow more forceful. Except they don't because his body still refuses to work for him. That's the biggest load of shit he's ever heard! Especially after everything he's seen since Sasuke's return. _You're lying—_

"Our meetings were discovered," Sasuke begins, slowly. It sounds like he's forcing himself to continue. "Even though I tried to make them appear accidental and Kakashi," he grits his teeth, "found out. He warned me off. Didn't want to report you for treason against Konoha. He found me again, that last night we were together. Happened upon us just as I... Then you knocked me out and left."

_What?_

But even as he asks it, something exquisite is gradually building in his chest. Something warm and heartrendingly beautiful. There is no name to this intensely delicate feeling that keeps welling within him and he can't find it in himself to care. But he finds that it also hurts.

It hurts so much.

"You can stop running now," Sasuke says, voice low. It's shaking and reverberates through his skin. Through his mind and he realises that he can't feel Sasuke behind him anymore. He can't see anything, either. He feels oddly weightless. Almost bodiless and it scares him. Terrifies him in way he's never felt before. "Or at least, wait for me."

_Wait for me…_

* * *

The ending is open for interpretation. Hope you guys enjoyed it.  
I found this on my memory stick in my handbag and decided I'd finish it. I started it sometime last year before I even started on Sanctuary.  
Reviews, con-crit, questions are all welcome! See any errors? let me know!


	2. Author's Notes

**AUTHORS NOTE**

* * *

Not an update at all, guys. I apologize, but rather the above.

I would like to wholeheartedly thank each and everyone one of you for your reviews/comments/critique to this story. An author will never improve if they don't know what they're doing wrong and although you guys all enjoyed this story, I am also aware that there is still much that I must develop to really achieve what I want.

There were also a number of questions that I tried to answer, however due to anon reviewing this was made impossible for a few of them. I dithered on putting this note up for a bit before finally coming to a decision and really hope this isn't pulled down or my entire story for not abiding by the terms of services etc.

Okay, so this is to answer a set of questions as I was not given an email to reply to and figure there are possibly others that were too worried about asking for fear of the answer.

Ignorance is bliss, yes? At any rate, hopefully this answers your queries without changing your interpretation of the conclusion too much.

**Question one:** Did Sasuke and Kakashi have sexual relations?

The answer to that is **no**. Sasuke _**did not**_ screw Kakashi within an inch of his life as it would appear in the story. Sasuke was, in fact, taking his frustration out on his former teacher in the usual sense; by sparring with him. Although, I might add, he was not holding back since the collapse of his relationship with Naruto was partially due to Kakashi's interference to begin with. Also why I gave an extra warning to check the pairings before continuing on, just to get the point across.

_**I will not write**_ a pairing unless I warn about it first, in case of squicks—disregarding, cannon-pairings like Sasuke/Sakura, Naruto/Sakura, Naruto/Hinata etc)—I've come across enough to give me nightmares and have a point of not even _**contemplating**_ a story in which Sasuke bottoms. Even if it's a role reversal. I will not go there. At all. Granted, technically, I implied Sasuke topped Kakashi.

But again no. These two did not have sex, at all, during my story.

**Question two:** Did Sasuke kill Naruto and if so, why?

Okay, this left me absolutely baffled. But it is a valid question and if one person asked about it, one can assume that there were a great many more people not brave enough to ask the same thing. The answer, as with the former question is no. Sasuke did not kill Naruto.

**Question three:** I thought that Naruto didn't want to go back to Sasuke and yet at the end he and Sasuke have sex again. What the hell? There is absolutely to reasons given—courtesy, of my younger sister.

This stumped me the most, I think, of my questions. But to answer, they **aren't** having sex at the very end at all.

**Question four:** What happens next?

This I can truthfully not answer as I came up with about four satisfactory endings myself and couldn't decide which I was happiest with (they change given my mood and right now, as I am plied with TimTams, a block of Whittaker's Peanut Butter chocolate and a mug of steaming tea, it would be of the happier variety.)

~Gen


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